... ishmael n. daro | 2009 | September

Archive for September, 2009

September 28th, 2009

What an embarrassing man

Silvio Berlusconi — the 73-year-old Italian prime minister who allegedly slept with an 18-year-old model — is perhaps the most embarrassing thing to happen to Italy since Donatella Versace.

Here’s a great photo of the man (via the Telegraph):
berlusconi

Berlusconi rose to power in the 90s after a long business career in such varied fields as real estate, banking, professional football, and most significantly, television. Today, his empire and his powers as prime minister give him a virtual monopoly on the Italian media. As a result, few people in Italy fully realize what a clown the man is.

Recently he has made several remarks about Barack Obama being “suntanned.” According to Sky News, however, this isn’t the first time he has put his foot in his mouth.

Mr Berlusconi’s previous gaffes include telling US businessmen that Italy was a great country to invest in “because we have fewer Communists nowadays and beautiful secretaries, superb girls”. After meeting Denmark’s Prime Minister Anders Fogh Rasmussen in 2002, he described him as “the best-looking Prime Minister in Europe”.
The Italian PM also suggested his Danish counterpart should have an affair with his wife, former actress Veronica Lario.
In 2005, Helsinki demanded an explanation when he said he had used “playboy tactics” to persuade Finnish President Tarja Halonen to back Italy as the site of the European Food Safety Authority.

The most amazing thing, other than the fact that Berlusconi has gotten elected three times, is that he has never been successfully convicted of any of the myriad crimes he has been accused of committing. Well, almost. The most interesting thing about Berlusconi is that the septuagenarian has no wrinkles or grey hair.

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September 23rd, 2009

Michael Moore is a big fat idiot

ISHMAEL N. DARO
Opinions Writer

As if 2009 wasn’t already a rough year for capitalism, now Michael Moore has set his sights on our venerated economic system.

In his latest film Capitalism: A Love Story, Moore uses the current financial fallout as the backdrop for his attack on the economic system that brought the world to its knees almost exactly one year ago, as well as the culture and politics that have allowed for greed to be the ruling currency of our age.

Capitalism will hit theatres Oct. 2 and early reviews have been almost unanimously positive. But the last thing we need is Michael Moore’s latest propaganda flooding multiplexes.

Moore has carved out a career for himself by championing the cause of the little guy but his methods and motivations are far from pure. His first documentary, Roger & Me, came out 20 years ago and chronicled the closing of a GM plant in Moore’s hometown of Flint, Michigan.

MichaelMoore The central theme of the film is that Moore cannot get an interview with GM CEO Roger Smith, the heartless tycoon responsible for all the misery in Flint. The only problem is that Moore did interview Smith. Twice! Yet Moore conveniently left that out of the film, since it made a more appealing story-line to exclude Smith.

Although he had taken out a second mortgage on his home in order to film Roger & Me, the risk soon paid off. Before long, Moore was producing television shows and more documentaries, all with the David vs. Goliath motif. But the pattern of deception he had set in his first film proved to be too good to abandon.

Bowling for Columbine, Moore’s anti-gun documentary focusing on the Columbine high school shootings of Littleton, Colo., used similar sleight of hand techniques to make his point. The iconic first scene of the film, in which Moore gets a free rifle for signing up for a bank account, was entirely prearranged.

Footage of NRA president Charlton Heston was taken out of context to paint him as an insensitive gun-nut taking joy in the Columbine massacre. In fact, the NRA cancelled most scheduled events at its meeting in Denver that year. It only maintained its general meeting, which as a non-profit, the NRA was forced to hold by law.

Michael Moore

Heston holding a rifle over his head and growling, “From my cold dead hands,” took place a whole year after the massacre but Moore massaged the footage to suggest Heston was doing so in the grieving community of Littleton immediately after the shootings.

Bowling for Columbine went on to win an academy award despite its many flaws, launching Moore into mainstream consciousness and making him an icon of the American left wing. His subsequent films Fahrenheit 9/11 and Sicko have made Moore the wealthiest documentarian in history.

Canadians should know better than most how deceitful Moore can be. In his 2007 health care documentary Sicko, he presents Canada’s health care system as a utopian project that leaves everyone happy and satisfied. Although it is no doubt superior to American health care, Canada’s health care also has its problems such as long waiting lines and chronic underfunding. Canadians recognize this but Moore glosses over it in order to forward his political agenda.

Also, in Bowling for Columbine Moore walks around an affluent neighbourhood in Toronto and claims to find nothing but unlocked doors, What a great country Canada must be! Moore’s producer has since admitted that only 40 per cent of the doors they tried were unlocked but the truth has never stopped Michael Moore before.

Like many Canadians, Debbie Melnyk and Rick Caine felt Moore was a progressive voice in American politics, fighting the conservative establishment through humour and wit. So, in 2004, the two filmmakers travelled south to film a documentary about the man they admired. However, they soon unearthed many of the common criticisms against Moore that they had previously dismissed as Republican smears.

Melnyk and Caine also found that Moore was a slippery fish when it came to actually speaking with them about his work. But even though they could not confront Moore directly, they exposed his many lies and misrepresentations in their own documentary Manufacturing Dissent.

Documentaries are strange hybrids of news and entertainment. On one hand, they try to shed light on areas of concern. On the other hand, they also have financial pressures that encourage dishonest behaviour if it might make the film more profitable.

The Center for Social Media at American University recently released a report about documentary filmmakers and what guides their storytelling. Although most people interviewed strive to be honest, they also admit to fudging the truth and manipulating certain facts and sequences in order to show the “higher truth.”

In Michael Moore’s case, this fudging is especially pronounced. Furthermore, by casting himself as a working class hero, the millionaire documentarian merely exploits the working class. In both Bowling for Columbine and Fahrenheit 9/11 he uses tragedy to further his own anti-Bush agenda. In Sicko, he uses the stories of Americans screwed over by the health care system to make himself out to be a hero.

In Moore’s upcoming release Capitalism: A Love Story, he once again uses the truly tragic consequences of the financial meltdown and its many victims to cast himself as the star. Once again, Moore has confused celebrity for credibility.

- –
photo Jonathon Berger

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September 23rd, 2009

Finally, some funny Monty Python

Peter Griffin once joked about “the other 178 hours of Monty Python stuff that isn’t funny or memorable.” Not that Family Guy is anything special anymore, but it certainly seems that Monty Python’s reputation is slightly inflated by the group’s many fans.

When old reruns of Monty Python’s Flying Circus are on TV, the jokes are sometimes outdated — comedy doesn’t always age well — but usually the show is just flat-out unfunny. Sure, some of the sketches are cute, but I can’t imagine watching season after season of it.

Still, I just came across this Python sketch about a Robin Hood-like character named Dennis Moore. Thanks to the magic of YouTube, here are parts one and two.

Update: A recent NYTimes piece about the surprising longevity of Monty Python’s Flying Circus.

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September 17th, 2009

Glenn Beck and neo-Nazis

As a Canadian, watching the health care “debate” taking place in the United States right now is heart-breaking and rib-tickling.

It’s heart-breaking because so many people have been screwed by the system and whatever bill finally comes through Congress (if any) will likely not achieve universal coverage. It’s rib-tickling because watching crazy people accusing a centrist president of socialism is so absurd.

One of the main drivers of right wing anger has been Glenn Beck who, among other things, accused Barack Obama of having a “deep seated hatred for white people.” Paradoxically, Beck has also started the 9-12 Project, which is his call for Americans to return to how they felt the day following the World Trade Center attacks in 2001:

The 9-12 Project is designed to bring us all back to the place we were on September 12, 2001. The day after America was attacked we were not obsessed with Red States, Blue States or political parties. We were united as Americans, standing together to protect the values and principles of the greatest nation ever created.

Of course, the 9-12 Project does have an entirely anti-Democratic stance that lines up pretty perfectly with the Republican agenda. But wait! This isn’t about partisanship — it’s about the values and principles of the greatest nation ever created!

The claim to greatness not withstanding, the actual principles and values that Beck has listed are also of the conservative sort. Even better, he had to really wrack his brain to come up with 9 of one and 12 of the other to shoehorn into his numerical theme.

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September 13th, 2009

Newlywed stabbing

Here’s a disturbing news story.
After only two weeks of marriage, a newlywed couple’s home was broken into in Victoria, B.C. When the wife went downstairs to check on the noise, the robber stabbed her in the leg. Luckily, the police have an idea of what he looks like:

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September 12th, 2009

Immaculate Machine becomes sentient

immaculateishmael
On Immaculate Machine’s 2007 album Fables, the single “Dear Confessor” declared, “Maps won’t show us where we’re going; all they are is just the boring facts.”

Now, two years later, the band seems to be listening to its own advice. Founding member and frontman Brooke Gallupe says he has no grand strategy for Immaculate Machine.

“I have no real definite plans for the future. I’m going to surprise myself as well.”

Immaculate Machine released their latest album High On Jackson Hill in April. Since then, Gallupe and his fellow bandmates have been touring sporadically around North America promoting their new material.

“I think that people who are coming in with an open mind are loving it. To me it’s objectively a big step up; it’s sounding great. I’m really excited about playing the new stuff,” said Gallupe.

High on Jackson Hill is a bit of a departure from Immaculate Machine’s previous efforts. Though the songs are still catchy pop tunes, the tempo has slowed and the guitar riffs have multiplied, infusing the album with some head-bobbing rock overtones.

Gallupe says some fans have not taken to Jackson Hill as easily as the previous albums.

“We had fans that were excited about certain aspects of the band and some people are alienated by it, by the little changes we’ve made.”

That alienation was certainly not felt when the band played to a packed house at Amigos Cantina on Sept 5. Many attendees happily sang along to the songs, both old and new.

The show had added significance since it was a homecoming of sorts for one of the touring members, Brooke Wilken, an ex-Saskatoonian now living in Victoria.

The current lineup differs from what it has been and Gallupe admitted that it is “very fluid at the moment.”

Gallupe started Immaculate Machine when he was still a teenager along with Luke Kozlowski and Kathryn Calder, who also sings part-time with The New Pornographers. In those early days, the little-known band toured extensively, released their own music and printed their own T-shirts.

Gallupe described their early enthusiasm when attending music industry conferences with seminars on how to tour and other tips.

“We’d sit there and listen with notepads and everything. We were really serious at that point too, and we’d come out and think, ‘Hold on a minute, we already toured. This is bullshit,’ ” said Gallupe.

“Sometimes the best way to start out is just to go ahead and do it. And we got better and better. You’re going to go and suck at booking shows, suck at making shirts, suck at playing music, everything of course, but that’s sort of the way we chose to go.”

The band was eventually signed to Vancouver-based Mint Records in 2005. However, they retain much of the do-it-yourself ethos from the early days. According to Gallupe, Mint Records is a “really hands-off label” that lets its artists make music with little interference.

“It’s basically like having another five or six band members whose job it is to every once in a while send an email out or mail your CDs to a radio station and that kind thing.”

Mint didn’t even intervene when the band re-released some of their songs translated into French.

When Grant Lawrence of CBC Radio 3 called them “language geeks” and joked that the next album would be in Chinese, the band called his bluff.

“None of us speak Mandarin or anything like that but we got our friend to translate ‘Dear Confessor’ for us and teach it to us phonetically,” laughed Gallupe.

For the latest album, Immaculate Machine teamed up with well-known producer Colin Stewart. Stewart has produced albums for bands like Hot Hot Heat, Ladyhawk and Black Mountain. Gallupe says Stewart’s style matches his own sense of spontaneity.

“Colin Stewart’s strength as a producer is also like, ‘Just try whatever’ and it’s in a really relaxed environment, and there’s usually something cool that comes out of it,” said Gallupe.

That sense of spontaneity was visible when the band performed at Amigos. At one point, two band members couldn’t help but laugh as Gallupe extended a guitar solo for several minutes. Though it was clearly not planned, everyone played along happily.

The hour-long set got the audience dancing, especially when former Saskatoon resident Wilken challenged the crowd to show off their moves. The band appeared to be having fun as well, and Gallupe acknowledged that the band loves touring. While they all get along, Gallupe did have a mysterious bruise on his arm, which he had trouble explaining away.

“Maybe someone’s beating me in my sleep,” he said with a smile. “That’s how we get our aggression out. To keep enjoying the tours we start unconsciously beating each other.”

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September 8th, 2009

Comic: After Dark

AfterDark

Click image to enlarge

Thanks to bitstrips.com for the technology to do this, despite my utter lack of artistic talent.

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September 3rd, 2009

The Google empire

Many people have tried to categorize the current crop of young, techno-savvy hipsters with a catchy moniker. Internet, YouTube and iPod Generation have all failed to take hold. The most accurate name, however, is the “Google Generation.”

For better or for worse, young people today are defined by the technology they use. And no one technology has been more instrumental in the digital shift than the Google search engine.

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